Tonight, after spending an hour or so of quality time with one of Random Hall's freshmen with more refined tastes, I was forced to admit defeat in a contest of tastelessness, which spanned a broad range of topics from portly persons to conclusions inferred from our professor's "fabuluth" shoes.
I dare claim that this defeat was a matter of time constraint, in that our judge was forced to make a decision before we needed to disperse, which left me no time to pull out my secret weapon (borrowed, with many thanks to my amazing brother):
"So, Griffin, if I boil all the vegetables, what do I do with all the wheelchairs?"
Now, as I prepare to wind down for bed, I am attempting to cancel out the amped-up effects of an entire liter of double-dark Lipton's tea with a glass of my favored poison. This unhealthy lifestyle clearly does not bode well.
Further bulletins as events warrant.
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