Otherwise titled "Why I Am Unfit to be Staff."
First off, let me address the fact that when you said "questions," you really meant "urges to robble some knob."
Robble robble robble.
Speaking of robble, they don't have the Hamburglar in Happy Meals anymore. They don't even have Grimace or that whiney little Birdey kid either. And the Fry-Guys. Where did they go?! Maybe Ronald had them all whacked so he wouldn't have to share the spotlight with them. Damn that cunning meat-clown. Two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun, indeed. Man, I'm craving me some hash browns right about now. And a biscuit with sausage & egg.
Secondly, I hate to say it, but offering your double cheese whopper doesn't work anymore. You've already nibbled my nuggets before and we still draw straws to see who has to deal with you. It's like getting a drippy McFlurry to the face. So just chill out. And while you're at it, stop dippin' your desperate-ass dots in the goddamn newbie bowl already. For us, it's like trying to keep a fat kid off the fry tray. Gross!
And that's why I don't speak on behalf of the staff members. Ever.
Further bulletins as events warrant.
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